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Post by bbbearsmom on Sept 13, 2020 23:25:29 GMT
Monday, 09/14
Do you have any problems with people commenting on your “dieting” or the way you eat, or your body size?
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Post by bbbearsmom on Sept 13, 2020 23:26:04 GMT
When I was young and too thin people thought they had the right to make comments about my body size, and about my eating. I didn't like it but never talked back. I think it is best if people don't comment on other people's bodies, or eating. Sometimes my husband makes comments about how small I am and thinks I could eat some more. I don't let the comments bother me. I am making sure I don't lose any more weight.
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Post by lani on Sept 13, 2020 23:31:05 GMT
No, but I was never radically overweight. 165 was my highest but I was 19 at the time and carried that much weight without really feeling that fat. Everything stuck out rather than hanging down, if you know what I mean.  |
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Post by bbbearsmom on Sept 13, 2020 23:41:02 GMT
When I was obese my doctors would comment I needed to lose weight. Twice I had hour long conversations with two different family members that wanted me to lose weight. But other than that I didn't have comments on my weight when I was obese. When I was too skinny I got a lot of comments that I was too skinny.
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Post by cathygeha on Sept 14, 2020 7:51:29 GMT
I remember:
* Mom telling me when I came back to the table at a restaurant (I was carrying post-delivery baby weight) that she saw a really pretty fat girl then realized it was me...talk about a backhanded compliment/dig... * a "friend" of the family in Lebanon commenting, "You got fat/gained weight!" (Wanted to smack her but said that yes I had...she did it often so began to ignore her but it was not pleasant)
* Someone I barely knew and had seen a few times saying, "Boy you gained weight! Why?"
(for that one I told her that I must be happy) * A woman in the Wednesday group was always eyeing the weight of all of us. She came to a lunch at Christmas after being away for months and came up and said, "You really gained weight - you are fatter than Lina now!" with Lina there and me, too. If we gained a pound or lost it she ALWAYS commented on it.
At this point I am on the losing weight instead of gaining weight side of the scale and have not seen anyone for awhile so have no idea what they might say. Not worrying about it and don't let those comments bother me as weight is just that.
As for food comments...my husband can bug me by telling me what works for HIM and how I should fill up on fruit before meals or eat more of this or that or not avoid fats or whatever. I try to let those slide off, too.
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Post by mac on Sept 14, 2020 15:27:42 GMT
I really have not had a big problem with people telling me I'm overweight but I know such comments can be very hurtful and don't help us in our weight loss journey.
Six of us in my family have started a weight loss journey, we are all doing different programs. We report our weight on Monday to my DIL. For one person in the group its turned in to who has lost the most or gained. I explained to them its not a competition but rather an opportunity to lose weight. Some people are doing real good. Hope we can keep it going. I haven't gained anything in several weeks but need to lose ten pounds to get to goal. My son went back to Dallas so now I plan to get serious about getting this ten pounds off by journaling everyday, moving more, eating only allowed points (28), drinking water and getting more sleep.
The WW studio here in my town remains closed and my virtual home group was closed last week. This past week I did get on two Zoom meetings with two of the top ten coaches that were excellent meetings, there were twenty people in one class and thirty in another so I plan to join again this week on Zoom as I need the accountability.
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Post by bbbearsmom on Sept 14, 2020 16:41:01 GMT
mac, Glad you found some good meetings. cathygeha, That was what it was like when I was too skinny. People would just say things to me. I remember my senior prom date suggested I gain weight. My sister wanted me to get a padded bra so I would fill out my maid-of-honor dress at her wedding. One comment I use to get was: Being that skinny can't be healthy. First year of college I was commuting. On one the rides home I was sitting between my two friends in the front seat and they lectured me on being skinny all the way home, it wasn't healthy, I wouldn't get dates. People would say things to me I guess to make me feel better. One was rich men liked skinny women, another was they would bring up Audrey Hepburn and later Twiggy. All this sent a clear signal that my body was not acceptable. When I got married the first time I married into a family of eaters and adopted their habits, turned 30, got a sit down job and have had a weight problem ever since. After all these years of maintaining I feel I'm in a good place with my eating habits.
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Post by lani on Sept 14, 2020 17:00:30 GMT
bbbearsmom, "too fat, too skinny", can't win! Thank goodness this type of thinking seems to be on the way out.
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Post by mac on Sept 14, 2020 17:16:40 GMT
Back in the fifties when I was a young girl all the advertisements always had really thin girls and I wanted to look like them, this had a big influence on my weigh for many years as I wanted to be just like them. Models now are much different, more like normal size people.
I wondered if this had any influence on any of you ladies?
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Post by bbbearsmom on Sept 14, 2020 19:08:35 GMT
mac, I always say I grew up too skinny in the age of Marilyn Monroe, Gina Lollobrigida, Sophia Loren, and Bridget Bardot. All those women had well defined figures and to me that was society's expectation for woman's bodies. I didn't notice that models were skinny.
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Post by cathygeha on Sept 15, 2020 7:06:23 GMT
mac, How marvelous to have a family group to check in with on the weight loss journey back to goal weight. My sister and I check in daily or more often even than that and added the weight loss app and support to our emails in May. It has been marvelous.
As for the growing up in times of and models influencing ideal weight perception...I was in the time of Twiggy and could NEVER be that way due to my bone structure. I can be thinner but when thinner am more of an hour glass than a twig. Not sure what shape I will be at 68/9 when I reach goal weight again but the middle may not be as trim as it once was at goal weight. I think I also wanted the fifties body...more like my mother's...with the big boobs, trim waist and hips...not the Twiggy body.
bbbearsmom, People can be so rude and don't filter their words. I don't know if they are trying to be helpful or hurtful sometimes. Some people may think they are helping but at times it seems they are just in it to point out flaws and in so doing feel better about themselves. i am glad you are at a weight that you are comfortable with and can maintain. I am looking forward to being able to say the same! |
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Post by lani on Sept 15, 2020 17:45:54 GMT
I wondered if this had any influence on any of you ladies? Also, check out Wed, 9/09's thread on this topic. |
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Post by surfgirl on Sept 16, 2020 3:36:54 GMT
Nope, it's nobody's business anyway.
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