|
|
Post by bmazzo on Dec 3, 2021 2:56:34 GMT
Silver linings shine bright!
Since some of us live alone or far away from family, here are a few tips to ease loneliness during the holidays.
1. Listen to signals: We tend to judge ourselves if we feel lonely, even when we're not alone. Feeling isolated activates the same brain region as fasting: we need to connect just like we need food. Remind yourself that it's okay to be lonely, we all experience it.
2. Be real: Holidays often stir longings for deeper attachments. This can set us up for disappointments. You will feel better when you let go of the Rockwell-like expectation.
3. Share intentions: Forge stronger bonds by letting down your guard. Suggest to an adult child that you get together for coffee a few times a month. Ask a close friend or partner to let you talk about your interests & hobbies.
4. Just say hello: People who talk to friends or family just 10 minutes a week experienced less loneliness than people who didn't ring up a friend. Set a small connection goal & build from there.
Anyone experience real loneliness? Are you more lonely during the holidays? Do you have any holiday traditions to look forward to?
FUN: When was the last time that you received a flower delivery? Any other kid of gift that was delivered to your home?
|
|
|
|
Post by cathygeha on Dec 3, 2021 12:01:10 GMT
Anyone experience real loneliness? Hubby is always around so...not really...though I do miss friends and other family
Are you more lonely during the holidays? no
Do you have any holiday traditions to look forward to? no
FUN: When was the last time that you received a flower delivery? Any other kid of gift that was delivered to your home? Okay...today we are picking up a package at the post office. Our daughter sent it 2 months ago and it is just arriving. The postman could not FIND us but ah well...we will go. My husband brings flowers from the garden but have not had a delivery of flowers since...I don't know if I have EVER had one? |
|
|
|
Post by cherryt38 on Dec 3, 2021 15:03:00 GMT
I'm not usually alone on Christmas, my son and sometimes my youngest daughter is here. This year may be different as my son is flying out the next day to go to a retreat. I may not see him at all on Christmas. So I'll revert back to the reason for the season. Christmas is not about us, it is to celebrate Jesus' birthday. So I will focus on that this year. I'm sure I'll be talking to all my kids though, on the phone.
I'm not usually lonely even though I am at home by myself. I am content just being here. I talk to my youngest daughter every day when she is driving to and from work. I go to my neighbor's for coffee every once in awhile, and I talk to friends on the phone. Sometimes the kids and I facetime on our phones.
I've been given bouquets of flowers, but if they have ever been delivered, it has been years. Now sometimes I buy myself flowers from the grocery store. Occasionally on of my kids will send me a gift through the mail or have one delivered by Amazon.
|
|
|
|
Post by jasimons on Dec 3, 2021 17:51:41 GMT
Holidays - we often go on Christmas Day to a gathering with my husband's side of the family. If that's not possible for some reason, it's OK to be home that day.
At all times of the year, I might be alone quite a lot, but not lonely. Technology has made it much easier to stay in touch easily and quickly, but even before that, it was OK.
Not any real strong holiday traditions that I can think of. The phrase "Rockwell-like expectation" caught my eye. A person sees the "perfect" celebrations on shows or commercials etc, but...that's not reality, so I do remind myself of that.
Flowers delivered - probably back when college age or a bit after? I do exchange gifts with a couple of friends (who are not nearby) at Christmas time & birthdays, we mail the items, so, those are delivered.
|
|
|
|
Post by Holly Gail on Dec 4, 2021 0:24:03 GMT
From Thursday's thread: bmazzo, Bev, thanks for telling me about the Eating Well magazine articles. I can do a search on their website. And I don't have any prescription medications either. Today's: The first time I became a single mother after having been married for eight years, I took my son on Christmas Day to a local nursing home to visit people who didn't have family visiting them for the holiday. It was a sobering experience. I still remember the woman we spent the most time with. She was in bed, sitting up, wearing a cardigan sweater buttoned in the back. She wanted it turned around. I helped her, but an employee came in as the woman was taking the seater off altogether; the employee told me (very nicely) that this woman didn't know everything she was doing, hinting at dementia before everyone knew that word, and together we persuaded her to keep the sweater on. I can't say I ever felt particularly lonely on a holiday... even during the Thanksgiving when I was living in Europe... |
|
|
|
Post by bmazzo on Dec 4, 2021 1:26:12 GMT
Forgot to answer my own questions!
Although, I have never really lived alone, I know that we can feel lonely, even when we are not alone. I am more lonely now than ever before, I have always been around kids. I had my first child when I was only 19 and my last one when I was 34! So I had a child in school for 30 years! My 2 sons are almost 15 yrs apart, so it was like raising 2 completely different families. Now that there is just myself & DH here, I have very few relatives left. Only 2 female cousins that aren't suffering from dementia. The one that I was closest to & used to go shopping with, now has dementia and is home bound. The other two, I am not close to. Maybe talk to one of them once ever 3 or 4 months. GS (who lived with me for the first year of his life), our only surviving grandchild, is now 16, so no more little ones for me.
Not really any lonelier around holidays than any other time, in fact, maybe less lonely , since the kids are always around.
|
|
