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Post by surfgirl on Jul 22, 2020 2:11:02 GMT
TODAY’S MANTRA: Once I accept the changes I have to make, and just respond with 'Oh well', dieting will be easier.
Today we’ll be reflecting on how we deal with disappointment related to our weight loss - be it disappointment at not losing what we hoped we would during our weigh in, or whether it’s being disappointed that we can’t just run out and grab an ice cream cone during a hot summer evening every time we desire one…and for the record, I wanted one really, really badly last night! Beck says that even though we now have many new skills to fight sabotaging thoughts and to increase our confidence, we should expect to face times of self-doubt and disappointment…and to think you thought all you needed to do was read the book…Ha! She reminds us that a new mindset can take years to solidify.
Think about how many years you engaged in bad eating habits…how many years was that? Don’t expect your new behaviors to take hold 100% of the time from the get go, it takes time to re-program ourselves to a new behavior and it’s normal to feel disappointed with what you think you ‘lost’, but think about how great it’ll feel to reach/maintain your goal weight. Once you accept that new normal and follow the steps in the program, losing/maintaining will become easier, like breathing in and out…we don’t think about that do we, we just do it!
Beck encourages us to simply respond to our desires for going off program by simply saying, “Oh well!” to that desire, and letting it go. You want that donut? Oh well. Want to dive into that chips bowl? Oh well. How are you doing with saying “Oh Well” and shrugging it off when you want something you know you shouldn’t have? Sabotaging Thought: I don’t think this will work for me. It seems too simplistic.Helpful Response: Oh well, it won’t take much time or effort to give this a try. What do I have to lose? A thin person is a trier!Sabotaging Thought: I don’t want to accept the things I have to do. Dieting should be easier.Helpful Response: Oh well, I have a choice: I can struggle the way I’ve been doing, and know the consequences. Or, I can try something new.
A thin person puts on their big person pants and does what needs to be done…and without whining!
TODAY'S REFLECTION: How are YOU doing with 'Oh Well'? And based on the below model, which stage of behavior change are you at right now (be honest with yourself!)?
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lizlor
Transcendent Member
Posts: 1,159
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Post by lizlor on Jul 22, 2020 5:54:35 GMT
This round of Beck at this time I am definitely in action mode. It’s been a pretty good feeling so far. I need to work on the oh wells harder. Tonight at socially distanced outdoor book club I took kombucha as my beverage of choice, not wine, but did accept a packaged chocolate chip cookie. That might have been an oh well moment as I didn’t plan it. Oh well on to tomorrow.
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Post by cathygeha on Jul 22, 2020 7:15:12 GMT
How are YOU doing with 'Oh Well'? And based on the below model, which stage of behavior change are you at right now (be honest with yourself!)?
DEFINITELY in ACTION mode at the moment. I track on iTrackBites before every meal and have only had a few splurge moments in over two months. I have found that after those splurge moments I have said "Oh Well" and moved back OP immediately.
Last week I splurged, overindulged, and paid the consequences of wrestling with the feelings brought on by the scale being up again and not moving down as I had hoped it would and even knowing why and that it had been my choice I wasn't thrilled but had an "Oh Well" attitude.
My sister and I are supporting one another daily as we lose weight this time and we realize that this is "forever" and that there will be times we make choices that will have the scale up BUT we also realize that more days on program than off should see us lower on the scale in the future.
I made a choice this morning. It is Wednesday - the day I used to give myself free rein at friends homes or at home if I did not get together with my friends - today I decided NOT to indulge as I usually do on Wednesdays. I might look up a recipe for a "treat" like popsicles that I can make at home and have them instead. If I go out I won't buy the item I consider an indulgence and "free" though it counts high in points/calories. If it does not come into the house I can't have it and..."Oh Well" to that!
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Post by luvvinlife on Jul 22, 2020 14:30:25 GMT
I’m in the Action stage. I’m happy to say that most of the changes have become habit. I’ve still got a few more to go before I can say “Oh well” to all of them.
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Post by bbbearsmom on Jul 22, 2020 17:22:11 GMT
I guess one of my disappointments is that I need to plan ahead when I eat away from home. I don't naturally order what is on plan in a restaurant or when I order take-out and I have to do the work of thinking ahead. As the years go by it has become easier to make the better decision. I'm very happy with being at goal weight and that helps me to handle being disappointed.
I'm at the maintenance stage.
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Post by lani on Jul 22, 2020 17:33:22 GMT
Maintenance.
I never was much for the Oh Well. It was too easy to oh well it when I went off plan. It is more realistic for me to acknowledge that this takes a certain amount of work and effort, and to own it and be proud of myself. Oh Well never really fit into the scheme of things for me. Different strokes and all that.
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Post by bbbearsmom on Jul 22, 2020 17:41:12 GMT
lani, Now that I think about it I probably agree with you. I don't believe in messing up and moving on unless you own the mistake, think about it, and figure out how you can do better next time. I'm against beating yourself up over a mistake, just take responsibility and do better the next time.
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Post by surfgirl on Jul 22, 2020 17:57:08 GMT
lani, Now that I think about it I probably agree with you. I don't believe in messing up and moving on unless you own the mistake, think about it, and figure out how you can do better next time. I'm against beating yourself up over a mistake, just take responsibility and do better the next time. I agree with Judy and Lani about the "Oh well", it's too easy to just overeat or go off plan and say "Oh Well" and NOT do the introspection that is required to avoid making the same choice next time. I think there are a few areas of Beck's program that need tightening up, and this is one of them. |
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