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Post by surfgirl on Aug 6, 2020 20:10:35 GMT
***NOTE: I see today's thread hasn't been posted by Judy and she hasn't been online since the 4th so I think she might have power outage issues. Hopefully she will check in with us soon, but I'll continue to re-post for her, from her old posts, until she's back online again***
Day 37 –Reduce Stress This is another fun day about how to reduce stress and we all love to do that. Step 1: Use the skills you learned from the book to solve the problems that are causing you to be stressed. (Although sometimes it takes a bit of digging to figure out the root cause of the stress.) Beck mentions using the priority chart in the book and the Seven Question Technique. Step 2: Relax. Beck suggest learning muscle relaxation, deep breathing, and guided imagery meditation to relax your body and mind. Step 3: Change you mindset. This is about the rules you have for yourself and others and learning to relax those rules. Identify the rules you have for yourself and others. Think about the words you use. For your “should” rules replace “should” with “it would be nice if.” Come to think of it that would also work with “have to” as in “I have to lose weight this week.” Beck suggests taking the words “always” and “never” out of your rules. Another thing is she suggest that you use the word “reasonable” when it comes to expectation. Also you need to look into how your rules can cause stress for you and others. Realize you don’t control or have limited control over other people. You can only control and change yourself. Also with rules for other people use the word “realistic” as in if you think people should know what you want you need to realize that it is realistic that they can’t know that unless you tell them. Do you have rules for yourself and others that cause you stress?
Have you learned to relax any of those rules? |
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ladymajky
Transcendent Member
220/169/150
Posts: 871 
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Post by ladymajky on Aug 7, 2020 0:05:30 GMT
Step 2: Relax.
Another group that I am in has been circulating a list of self-care ideas -- things to do whenever you are feeling stressed, down, blue or in need of a little cheer. The list is too long to duplicate here, but I can give you a flavor of it. All in the name of RELAXATION.
Play a board game, do a crossword puzzle, read a book, listen to a podcast, watch a favorite movie, watch cute animal videos.
Do some crafts, color, crochet, sew, quilt.
Light a scented candle, take a bath, put on a face mask, put on comfy pajamas, paint your nails, put on a nice outfit, make your bed.
Enjoy a cup of coffee/tea, eat a meal with no distractions (!), make a healthy snack, bake cookies for a neighbor, drink fresh lemon water.
Get some sunlight, go for a drive, go for a walk, sit on a park bench, watch birds, watch the sunrise, watch the sunset, gaze at stars, people-watch, pet a dog or cat.
Take a break from social media, avoid toxic people, call a friend, tell somone you love them, handwrite a note to someone, give a compliment to someone.
Pray, meditate, listen to music, sing, dance, practice visualization, practice gratitude, repeat an uplifting mantra.
Rearrange something in your house, declutter something, tidy up a small corner/drawer, take a nap.
Be kind to yourself, remember no one is perfect.
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Post by surfgirl on Aug 7, 2020 1:23:58 GMT
I'm a perfectionist and I have an aesthetic that things should be in a specific place, which may or may not drive my husband a bit bonkers, but I like things the way I like them! But for eating, I don't have rules that are inflexible, no. In fact, my flexibility with eating has gotten me in this mess in the first place! ladymajky , I like that list, lots of easy to do things there that we just don't take enough time for. One thing I do at night is shower with only my nightlight on sometimes, it's calming like taking a bath, but sometimes I don't want a long hot bath soak!
lani, irisinnia, ladymajky, do any of you ladies have Judy's email or a way to get in touch with her to see if she's okay? It's not like her to not show up for two days here... |
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Post by cathygeha on Aug 7, 2020 6:28:13 GMT
surfgirl, Thank you for stepping in! Hope Judy is okay!
Do you have rules for yourself and others that cause you stress? Not really...I used to have the Wednesday get together times that could be harder when I opted to be vegetarian/vegan BUT could always eat the vegetables. I like to get the walking in before lunchtime so sometimes I give up the walking to take hubby out on errand running and if unexpected it can throw me off since I know that waiting till afternoon to exercise will mean I don't get it done...usually.
Have you learned to relax any of those rules? I figure the exercise will or won't happen and I also realized that if I want to be vegetarian/vegan that is my choice.
As for should and must and rules...I have much less stress now that I am older
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Post by lani on Aug 7, 2020 16:01:40 GMT
Meditation and exercise are my de-stressors. I do stress about not getting things done, but somehow life goes on.
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Post by bbbearsmom on Aug 7, 2020 16:40:00 GMT
I stressed ate over the last few days. Now I have to wean myself away from it.
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lizlor
Transcendent Member
Posts: 1,159
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Post by lizlor on Aug 8, 2020 3:01:30 GMT
Not rules but best practices. I use exercise to keep stress under control- a quick walk in the woods near my home is usually all it takes to get me to reframe a poor mood. I also try and schedule things I want to do.
Food wise I’m still working in challenging sabotaging thoughts but I do have a draw a line and get back on track rule that works well some of the time.
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