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Post by bbbearsmom on Aug 25, 2020 23:26:17 GMT
Wednesday, 08/26
Thinking Mistake #5: Mind Reading
You're sure of what others are thinking, even in the absence of compelling data.
"People will think I am strange if I don't drink alcohol at the party."
"She'll think I'm rude if I don't try the brownies she baked."
Do you mind read? If you do how do you counter it?
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Post by bbbearsmom on Aug 25, 2020 23:27:27 GMT
I do mind read. I do worry about what people will think and what they expect me to do. I will end up eating things because I think people expect me to. It is another case where I have to catch myself doing having the thought and then talk myself through it. Usually I could not eat the item and it would be fine, it is all in my head.
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Post by cathygeha on Aug 26, 2020 6:09:00 GMT
I do it sometimes and sometimes more than others. I sometimes wonder if it is projecting our feelings or perhaps wanting to fit into the crowd OR not wanting to shake the status quo. People have always seen me as the one to make everyone laugh so on a day I am quieter people wonder if I something is "wrong" so avoid having questions asked. SO...one in the Wednesday group always wants sweets and people cater to that and her nut preference. Another doesn't like soup, etc. Not sure where this is going but four hours of sleep left my mind jumbled...
Anyway...I do this sometimes and avoid conflict by not changing things up. But, when I FULLY embrace something I don't worry about what others think and as a result have found that they will accommodate my changes (not eating meat for instance) without too much discussion because it is something I believe in. Hmm...
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Post by luvvinlife on Aug 26, 2020 14:44:50 GMT
I used to do this quite often. Now I realize that “No.” is a full sentence, no explanation. We teach people how to treat us and they usually respond accordingly. I had to practice ways to say no to food pushers. The last BBR helped me to be able to do that.
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Post by bbbearsmom on Aug 26, 2020 17:43:39 GMT
luvvinlife, What I needed to understand was that sometimes what I considered food pushing was just someone asking if I wanted something and a yes or no answer was okay. I would sometimes take the question do I want something as them saying I should have it.
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Post by surfgirl on Aug 27, 2020 19:48:16 GMT
I dont do this, thankfully!
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