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Post by bbbearsmom on Nov 21, 2023 23:51:13 GMT
BBR Chapter 8 Week 4
Day 22 – Say, Oh, Well, to Disappointment
Beck talks about times when this process might seem disappointing such as when you don’t see the weight you want on the scale, when you can’t eat what everyone else is eating, when the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. She tells us that when this happens, we need to remember we choose to diet and with that choice we have another choice: to make ourselves miserable by complaining or to accept that dieting does come with disadvantages but they are “a necessary means to an end.” You might not like dieting, but it is the actuality of what you must do to reach goal.
Beck tells the story about how her son handled going on a restrictive diet for health reasons. His attitude was to say: oh, well, and move on. She suggests that we use the phrase when confronted with sabotaging thoughts lamenting the problems we see with dieting.
Examples she gives:
I want that doughnut. Oh, well.
I really feel hungry. Oh, well.
I wish I could order a hamburger instead of a salad. Oh, well.
Those chips look so good. Oh, well.
I don’t feel like exercising today. Oh, well.
I don’t feel like writing down my food plan for tomorrow. Oh, well.
What disappointments have you run into while losing weight/maintaining your goal weight?
How did you handle the disappointments?
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Post by bbbearsmom on Nov 21, 2023 23:53:23 GMT
My biggest disappointment now is that doing this isn't as easy as it was in the beginning. It takes more work to get me to change my behavior and to be more on plan. I'm handling it by talking to myself a lot and taking baby steps.
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Post by cathygeha on Nov 22, 2023 8:29:23 GMT
For some reason the "OH WELL" phrase has always hit me "wrong" - it makes me think "oh well...why not go ahead and have it anyway?" and not "Oh well, you can't have it" and I really don't like the "can't" instead "choose not to"
My go to used to be and is coming back to being, "This food is delicious BUT it is available year round so giving it up this time is not a big deal because you can have it later in the year after you have reached goal weight." OR "This food is delicious and tasty so go ahead and have a small portion, count it, and move on."
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Post by lani on Nov 22, 2023 14:57:36 GMT
Oh Well never did resonate with me either, although I get the concept.
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Post by ermabom on Nov 22, 2023 15:19:03 GMT
Yeah, it doesn't resonate with me either. But bbbearsmom's comment about it all being harder now resonates! I would have imagined, when I started Beck in 2007, that I would have mastered all this by now. But I haven't. I've made progress but there is still a long way to go. The feeling of injustice, though, that 'oh well' represents is something I have mastered. I grew up with a mom and sister who could eat all they wanted. My mom lost weight easily and my sister still eats a lot more than I do and is thinner and fitter. She's also younger but not by that much. My brother, who was overweight for a large part of his life. became vegan and has lost and kept the weight off for more than 5 years. He doesn't suffer from any of the desire to eat stuff he shouldn't eat. I am the one who got the genes that my aunt had - where we gain weight. So I've had to live with injustice all my life and I've come to terms with it, whether I say 'oh well' or not. Life isn't fair and one has to accept the hand that one has been dealt.My hand is to deal with eating issues and weight gain.
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Post by susan092907 on Nov 22, 2023 18:55:12 GMT
My biggest disappointment now is that doing this isn't as easy as it was in the beginning. It takes more work to get me to change my behavior and to be more on plan. But bbbearsmom's comment about it all being harder now resonates! I would have imagined, when I started Beck in 2007, that I would have mastered all this by now. Same for me. I even thought I had it mastered when I was able to maintain well for about 5 years after getting to goal this time around. But then I started to regain, and that's where I've been for the past 7 years or so, working at losing and maintaining and then regaining again. And then cycling through that again. Still, I've kept my weight below my WW goal for all of that. I sometimes wish things were more like how they were many years ago, when I could eat more than my plan amounts and still lose weight. But then I have to remind myself that yes, I could lose weight so much more easily then, I was younger, but I lost so much weight and then regained so much weight for so many years, and now I've finally learned to maintain within a range, even if it is a bigger range than I'd prefer.
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lizlor
Transcendent Member
Posts: 1,161
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Post by lizlor on Nov 23, 2023 23:11:10 GMT
I wasnt a fan of the oh well statement and while I appreciated her son’s situation and discipline I couldn’t relate. Except now I have to bring my A1C down from pre-diabetic and also deal with my cholesterol and I’m understanding better why oh well is necessary. Time to deal. The reality is the food life I once is not the one I can age with. Oretty simple really. Oh well.
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