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Post by phyl on Aug 15, 2018 23:53:25 GMT
cj it is delona's mom was driving. she did have her eyes tested a few months ago and only needed glasses for distance and driving.
she says she did not see the van.( didn't have the glasses at the time.) we don't think she looked in the mirrors just moved over to change lanes. no one was hurt just her little ford and the van.
I call her mom.
I have another friend who is 88 and should not be driving.demacageneration in one eye and a fuzzy cataract in the other.the specialist said the shots are not doing any good.they don't want to do surgery on the other eye.well they were waiting to see how the shots would go.
so she has gone to walmart for glasses, the stupid doctor told her some older people go blind after having cataract surgery.do I want to shoot him????damn right.
I can see accident coming.just hope no one gets hurt or dies.
joyce told me she can see to drive if she closes one eye.I told her no you can't. your prepridal vision is not there.
I pray every night for god to find away for her to give up driving without any one getting hurt.least she can not drive at night.
I Have been afraid to ride with her for several years. haven't ridden with her in years.nuff said. phyl
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Post by gramma15 on Aug 16, 2018 1:54:42 GMT
Phyl, there was a woman who came to the Caps for kids meetings that brought her sister to one meeting when the sister came to town to visit. The sister was 94 but you would never have known it. She looked and acted like she was abut 60. She drove here from the town she lives in which is about 100 miles away and of course did fine. Some people do very well driving at older ages but there are some that don't and shouldn't be driving because they put other people's lives at risk along with their own. I have a friend who is 93, her husband is 95 and their children finally told him that he could no longer drive even though he still wanted to but they recognized that he was no longer safe. Luckily their children and grandchildren live in the same town and in fact these older people live in an "in law" apt in their daughter's home so they get a lot of help going places and having their errands done. Sounds like you had a busy day and if I lived near you I'd for sure buy that car!
CJ good to see you too. Yes that is a lot of points as the treats at the fast food places are getting smaller so I imagine the sundae is smaller than it used to be but is still 13 points for that small one. I know their fruit and yogurt parfaits that I used to get years ago are WAY smaller then they were back then and Wendy's frosty's are a lot smaller also.
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Post by phyl on Aug 16, 2018 2:27:17 GMT
ruth after the accident delona took mom's keys and the extra set.she had taken dad's long before. dad went to heaven last sept.
mom has some deminta and has to wear depends. delona has tried to get her to go into assisseted living. mom won't go.believe me it is not about money.
they opened a new place and one of mom's friends is there. delona has tried to tell mom you would be around people.
delona takes very good care of mom and has asured her she would still come to visit.delona checks on her mom every day.
sundays they take mom to breakfast.
thursday it is the hair appointment, friday groceries,the other day delona took mom to her cousin's funeral.
everyday 3 pm mom has her glass of wine. mom is a wonderful woman.
I just feel joyce with two bad eyes should not be driving for her safety. yes I know it has to be her decision. someday it will.
I tend to be a mother hen when it comes to the elderly.phyl
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Post by gramma15 on Aug 16, 2018 17:11:41 GMT
Phyl, it's not easy becoming a parent figure to your parent but it looks as though Delona is doing a great job. God does tell us to take care of our elderly and she is doing that. I smiled when you said you had a heart for the elderly. Well at my age I consider myself one of the elderly based on age alone. I am very capable of caring for myself.. I'm not sure what the actual definition of elderly is or if there is one but I would think that it refers to anyone probaly over 65
Nice pleasant day here although we still have smoke from the fires in the west. (of course we're in the west) and there are LOT of fires going on. I hear that they have smoke even as far east as Atlanta. It doesn't smell like smoke here but the air is cloudy looking because of it.
I did get a little crocheting done last night. I'm still on the third potholder/hotpad and it's a little larger than the others just as I had hoped so it can be used as a smaller hotpad to sit things on or a larger potholder. Today I'm hoping to do some work on the tree skirt but don't know yet what dh has planned and the skirt will be worked on after I do a little housework too. I can work on the potholder while talking and visiting with dh but with the skirt I have to follow directions
Have a great day all
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Post by gramma15 on Aug 16, 2018 17:14:44 GMT
Phyl, you are definitely right...Joyce should absolutely NOT be driving. What if she killed a whole family with small children in a car? Is there someone you can report this too? It's something we hate to do but you might save a life or lives.
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Post by choney2 on Aug 16, 2018 19:44:20 GMT
There is an excellent article on AAA.com about howo to approach a senior driver who really needs to hang up the keys!! Also good tips for mature drivers to keep the operation of their vehicle safe. Ginny
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Post by phyl on Aug 16, 2018 19:49:19 GMT
hi, ruth is up to her girls to convince her to stopped driving.her dd is nurse in the cardio unit.most of the friends,pick joyce up for night events.
I know a doctor can give her a driver's eye tests and tell her not to drive.
she mostly drives during the day only places she is famalier with ....but still we never know.
well did not get my sewing rooms cleaned at all. spent to much time on the computer. talked to dsil theresa,
made 3 jars of dill pickles and cleaned the kitchen.
now it is time to start on me.phyl
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Post by cj59 on Aug 16, 2018 21:10:25 GMT
Hello Crafters - Hope you are all doing well today
Phyl - I'm glad you have "mom" in your life. I'm going to have to try to make pickles some day since I love them now. I hated them when I was a child
Ruth - Sounds like your crocheting is coming along, hope you are able to work on the Christmas Tree Skirt.
Ginny and Meg - Hope you are getting in some crafting.
I dreaded the time when my father would have to stop driving. He was a very independent and stubborn person so I thought it was going to be tough to deal with. But he started having vision problems and had a few close calls while out driving and just decided on his own to stop. Fortunately I was living with him so I could take him out, but I know that was a sad time for him and the last few years of his life weren't that great because he had to stay home so much (especially the years when I was still working and he was alone).
It's something I dread thinking about because I don't have anyone in the family that will drive me around, so I'll definitely have to look for other options - like some assisted type living - if it comes to that. I know I would never want to be the cause of someone's death or injury just because I felt I could still get out and drive.
It's really hot here today, in the 90s with heat index over 100. I've stayed inside to stay cool and I'll go out later on to get the mail. I cooked some zucchini and broccoli in beef broth and that was nice to eat - even if it is so hot out.
I was looking at some of my fabric to see if I had something that would work as a border on the purple gingham block, but can't seem to find anything that is great. I did try a pink fabric around it and that might work.
Take care everyone!
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Post by gramma15 on Aug 16, 2018 21:32:37 GMT
WEll Phyl, I don't know anything about them of course but I have to say that even if one has adult children and one is a nurse doesn't mean that they are willing to or able to convince their mother that she shouldn't drive anymore. Yes it would be a huge blow to her to have to give up some of her independence but I'm sure she'd be even more devastated if she were the cause of someone's death. As you said, it's evidentally up to her daughters to find a way. Some adult children are just too wrapped up in their own lives and don't want the responsibility of "parenting" their parent. As I said, I have no idea if thats the case here. Sometimes it's just too difficult to approach a person and you know what their response will be.They should read the article that Ginny mentioned.
CJ, I'm glad you have to go out only for mail. I like some pickles but not a huge pickle fan. I did one time make some bread and butter pickles with my aunt but that was it. Here it sure wouldn't pay to buy the cucumbers to make them. If I was going to make some it should have been in NY where the veggies are abundant. They sure aren't here. So when I do eat pickles I'll have to continue buying mine. Here we do have a bus service for elderly and disabled people. I don't know if they come clear out here or not though. I do see them at Walmart which is only about 3 miles away so maybe.They at least used to come to a person's home and pick them up...didn't have a regular route like a city bus would.I'm sure they go to the senior and disabled housing which we do have a lot of here. They aren't even assisted living just places where seniors only live.One is next door to the library which would be great to me. It's not close to grocery stores though.I don't know how much the bus costs or how much it costs to live in one of those senior places. Less than assisted living I'm sure.Dh and I are always thinking about what we'll do when we're unable to drive.Back in NY I used to take dh's grandparents various places because they didn't drive.
I just got finished cleaning the kitchen so am ready to sit and crochet.
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Post by choney2 on Aug 17, 2018 1:03:40 GMT
Good evening!!
THe night nurse at the assisted living facility that I finally got my mom into had some awesome words of wisdom. I had to move her from her home town of 55 years to an assisted living facility in my home town, so that I could help care for her and make sure she was ok. I know she drove her car only a week or so before she broke her hip (which is what got her into assisted living after rehab) but from the looks of the car she had had many mini accidents with the side of her garage, or light stantions in parking lots. Anyway, she lamented one evening to her night nurse- a wonderful man who really tried to understand her and make her feel more at home here....my mom lamented that she still owned a car (which at that time she did) and that she wanted to drive. Tony told her that he was afraid that she might get lost up here- and he did not want that to happen to her, and he knew that I
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Post by megk31 on Aug 17, 2018 1:12:08 GMT
Hello, Ginny cj, Ruth & phyl. I know it has been awhile since I last posted. It has been so hot I don't feel like doing anything. Also Devin took over the computer and it has been hard trying to get him off. Today he went back to school so I hope to get some more computer time. I am just so tired of the heat and the smoke. I have done some crafting but not a lot. Tomorrow is Knit Wits day and I will probably go to that. It has been a ;ittle cooler this week but still in the 90s but that is better than 100+.
I think my blood count is low so I will have to get that checked. I have been tired and dragging myself around. I am due for a check up in Sept. Today I had my teeth cleaned. I have a little tag on the roof of my mouth and they X-rayed it but I will have to go to my primary care Dr. to have the tag taken care of if it doesn't go away in a couple of weeks.
I know I will have to give up driving in the near future. We do have Para Transit here. I will have to see my Dr. about using that service. . I think there is a charge for using it. I would have to book a date & time for them to pick me up at my home and if I want to be picked up for a return trip I will also make a reservation for that' I will have to find out more information about how it works. There are also people at my church who volunteer to provide transportation for people to get to church and medical appointments. I have used Uber a few times when I go for my eye injections. Most Dr. appointments I can still see well enough to get where I am going. I am far sighted and can see quite well. I have found that there are a lot off really nice people who come and ask me if they can help me. I just hate the thought of giving up my independence. . I am just trying to prepare myself for the time when I need to stop driving.
Old age is not for sissies. I hope I will be able to have more computer time now that Devin is back at school Have a good evening.
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Post by choney2 on Aug 17, 2018 1:42:59 GMT
Was just a mile away. Such a sweet answer, and it satisfied her. (Sorry my keyboard froze up before). Anyway, its a tough decision to make. Fortunately in my general area there is a senior bus that will take you pretty much anywhere, and for a dollar a ride. I know not all areas have that kind of service.
Ruth - glad you got some cleaning done....which I hope that you followed up with some crochetting!!
CJ- nice to hear that you are playing with fabric once again...did you decide to use that pink fabric with the purple gingham?
Phyl- what kind of pickles did you make? They are fun to make and pretty easy.
Hope Meg is doing ok. The fires in California seem to be getting worse- and while I do not think her area is in danger, its still a concern.
Have a good night all Ginny
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Post by choney2 on Aug 17, 2018 1:47:03 GMT
Meg we crossed messages in cyberland. Totally agree that old age is not for sissies!! Bravo to you for even entertaining a future in which you do not drive. Of course the thought of not being able to drive by yourself is not a pleasant one. I do know that there are articles on driving for seniors and even special defensive driving classes for seniors. Check out AAA.com for information on that.
Guess I better get some sleep....cooler temps are headed here in a few days. Very thankful for that. G
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Post by choney2 on Aug 17, 2018 11:50:28 GMT
Good morning!
Meg- hope you are able to get to Knit wits today! Is it a far distance from your home?? If I do remember correctly, every few months you do experience low blood counts that the doctor treats you for. Do you think you will try to get into the doctor earlier becasue you are feeling tired now? Sounds as though Devin was trying to get his last hurrah in- hogging the computer up- before he returned to school. I hope that this is a great year for him, it does seem as though some school years are academically more difficult than others. Is he a good student? We already know he is a great kid and reasonably easy to live with! Best of luck to him this year in school. It is encouraging to hear that your temperatures are cooler- I am hoping that some much needed rain is heading to your state (gentle rain).
THe first assisted living facility my mom was in (and that is a LONG story for another day) was great in that it had several different levels of living arrangements and care. The apartments were beautiful. Several residents kept their cars and drove (those that were able). WIsh my mom had been able to enjoy that place for a longer amount of time but medical issues came up and we were blessed that there was an opening in the assisted living facilty in town- which, on the same complex- is a hospital and nursing home.(all levels of care provided). It was a blessing to have all those levels of care right by our home for her.
Showers headed our way later on today and I think the temperatures start to drop tomorrow. I will be very thankful for that.
Phyl- regarding Joyce, the ability to drive is not merely a factor of the ability to see well or not. Perihperal vision goes down, reflex time/reaction time increases, and the flexibility needed to turn in the drivers seat to gain additional vision of situations is impared. Any doctor worth his/her salt should be well aware of that. Another approach would be a well timed call to the police- who could observe her driving when she goes out and pull her over. I have not read it in awhile, but that article on AAA.com was really well written and gave great tips on the subject.
Cj- did you figure out your fabric dillemma?
Ruth, how are your tomato plants?? THe other day the plants were not looking so good....(my plant is looking pretty awful now too). And of course I wonder if you ever got any zucchini.
BBL G
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Post by gramma15 on Aug 17, 2018 19:24:36 GMT
Meg, it is great to see you posting again. We miss you and anyone else that misses even a day. I hope Devin is happy with his schooling this year and I hope he finds some friends that will be good for him and not be influenced by bad examples.
Ginny, you stated so well all the things that need to be taken into consideration when an older person comtemplates whether or not to give up driving. It sounds as though your mom had an excellent place to spend her remaining time on this earth. All kinds of care readily available is for sure a blessing.
My tomato plants are looking really bad. There will definitely not be a bunch of little green tomatoes to put in the freezer this year. I picked some ripe ones yesterday. There are plenty there but most are still green and I'm hoping they will ripen and I think they will. Zucchini plants look great and if zucchini leaves were edible we'd be all set. Our plants do have some very impressive leaves. Unfortunately no zucchini. I still have the two the neighbor brought over. Haven't used those yet and now that I have them I'm not sure what to do with them. I could grate them and put in the freezer or I could just cook them up and eat them which is probably what I will do. Dh doesn't like zucchini except when made into zucchini bread. I made deep fried zucchini once and he liked that ok but we don't eat much in the way of fried food.
Ginny the other day you asked if I was going to use the wool or other yarn. Yes the yarn that came with the kit was like wool ease...80% acrylic and 20% wool. It's nice and I thought too nice to used for something that will be on the floor so I'm using Red Heart super saver for the skirt. I hope it holds up and doesn't pill. I'll tell them that if it does I'll make them another with a better yarn.I maybe should have used pound of love. It's a really nice yarn but I don't have any in red on hand and don't even know if they make it in red or not. I'll have to look into that.
I hope you all have a great day
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